Ryan Jonathan
What exactly is toxic positivity?
Toxic positivity is the belief that no matter how dire the situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. Toxic positivity happens when we are forced into being positive rather than embracing the overall situation and react accordingly. So instead of managing our peace of mind in a healthy way, we are told to keep being happy no matter what happens. Toxic positivity can backfire rather than actually motivates us. In this article, we are going to try and identify how dangerous toxic positivity is and why is it important to identify toxic positivity at an early stage.
The impact of toxic positivity to our lives
In general, everyone knows that being positive always leads to something nicer and better. However, it’s good to know that not all positives are good and neither are all positives bad. It’s safe to say that too much of a good thing does have a negative effect, positivity included. That’s why we have to be able to tell an act of toxic positivity apart from genuine positivity, because the impact between the two is wildly different. The impact of toxic positivity is significant because it usually happens gradually and not instantly, so we fail to notice the toxic positivity before it’s too late. Being able to identify it early and not let it grow is a start when dealing with toxic positivity. It’s also necessary, as toxic positivity could be harmful to our physical and mental health.
Examples of toxic positivity
An example of toxic positivity can be when something bad happens like you losing your job and people say “just stay positive” or “look at the bright side.” While these comments are meant to be sympathetic, it can also result in us not wanting to express what we were experiencing on the current issue. A few more examples of toxic positivity statements that are actually harmful rather than helping are “it could be worse,” “don’t think about it, stay positive.” These few examples might sound like reassurance for the speaker, but to the one currently experiencing the hardships, it might sound condescending and unhelpful. This is when toxic positivity takes place; when the wrong statements came out at the wrong time.
Why is toxic positivity so negative?
And why does toxic positivity be the total opposite to how it was supposed to be? Positive? There is no real right or wrong answer to this question, but too many of certain things would have a negative effect. Toxic positivity causes us to suppress our emotions, which in turn can increase physiological stress in our body. Rather than making us feel good, we in fact are isolating negative emotions. The moment we feel negative emotions, we feel guilt or shame in experiencing them and not willing to acknowledge them. Toxic positivity creates another problem by avoiding emotions that we should have felt in the first place, but instead we shut them down.
Why is it important to identify
It is very important to identify toxic positivity, as it will help us stay away from all the people that were doing it to us and negatively influencing us. If we’re also guilty of this, it can also mean that we were being a negative influence. By being able to identify the acts of toxic positivity, we can tell whether we are affected by it or we are the one projecting it. After that, we can plan the next step on how to deal with the toxic positivity that happens to us.
How to cope?
The process of coping with toxic positivity can vary among individuals. Some people can directly cut contact with the person that is projecting toxic positivity, while some need time to digest the situation. There’s no wrong way of coping with it. Likewise, when we are the perpetrator, most of the time it occurs because we are uncertain of how to express our sympathy, and we end up indirectly projecting toxic positivity. We can then slowly change our habit in responding to people whose trying to express their emotions with us.
While positivity has always been the goal for many people, it is alright to sometimes feel sadness, anger, or other emotions, because feeling all of them is natural. Toxic positivity has always been around because people thought that the only way to stay positive is to never feel anything else, but it’s not the right way to handle your emotions. Being able to express our deepest emotions can be challenging, so having the right group of friends that allows us to feel that way would be the greatest thing to happen to avoid toxic positivity. You can also try to express your emotion through decision-making. The way you choose you own path and your own choice are also the form of expressing your emotion. Through Memories Interactive, you can be yourself and choose your own path freely without feeling judgment. Memories is a story-based game which allows you to be yourself in your own world. You can download Memories freely for Android through this link and for iOS through this link.
